I already know I can’t search out, cobble together, what I need. It’s not right here, so I have to find it.
Does it become more valuable because I have to dig it from the ground? Wrench it from the Earth’s clutches?
In the seeking, I learn what’s truly desired. Or is it now an obsession? Or just a waste of time? Or is it just lost to me? Am I run by convenience and the unnecessary?
Easily distracted by everything; overshadowed by the Shiny. Here I am, allowing coercion, manipulation, influence.
Because I’m desperate, lonely, and willing.