Try To Name It

KONICA MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERA

It’s easy to be angry
But also a waste if
The heart of it all
Goes unnamed and
Unclaimed

Vehement cries deny
This is all anger
Nothing else

When you’re done
Screaming
Nothing’s changed

Pause
Try to name it
What’s going on
In your head?
Your Body

Chest compressed
Jaws clenched
Breath too fast
Hands balled into fists

Try – Disappointment?
Yes?
Try Again – Waste?
No.
Try Again – boredom?
maybe?

Name what it is
To be
Sick of waiting
Expectations too high
Life isn’t as hard
As we make it
Eat
Sleep
Take care

Did you see the stars?
That bird?
Feel, hear, see
Speak.

It’s all here,
You should be
Too.

Goals

I really wanted to
But,

There was a wall, a mile high, smooth with no handholds.
A fence, running long, draped with razor wire.
It was a mound of dirt, insurmountable.
A blade of grass, quaking in the wind.

It couldn’t be done. Not overcome, curbed, conquered, or defeated.

It was a snail trail. A crumb. A casting of light,
That kept me.

Unattainable. Hopeless. Not to be won. Mostly it was absurd to dream it.

I really wanted to
But,

I wouldn’t.

maybe it’s time for you to go

dinner isn’t ready. it won’t be. the stove is broken, the heating element snapped. there isn’t a clean dish in this house and we’re out of soap anyway. our food has spoiled. each veggie stalk moldy. fruit turned to mush. the bread ready for a penicillin harvest. there’s blood in the freezer, the meat thawed and weeping. the fridge has thrown in the towel. besides, the cutting board cracked. our knives all dull. the bulb in the kitchen burned out. dining together, it cannot be, the table covered with empty. i can’t see the floor, through the mud and the leaves. the bristles all bent, so sweeping is out anyway. when will you realize it just will not work? there’s nothing i can do to fix this.